PsychoSolipsist

I like all the members of my writer's group. They're all nice people.

When I first started attending the meetings, many of the group members did not realize that I was the "character" in my stories.

Virtually everything I write is autobiographical or semi-autobiographical. Invariably I am the main character, the arch-villain or sympathetic hero.

I am a narcissist and solipsist. I find myself to be intensely interesting and utterly fascinating.

The other members of the group, not knowing that my "character" was me, would say things like "This guy is a psychopath!" or "He's certainly a sociopath!" or "This is one sick individual - he's practically schizophrenic!" or even "What an asshole!"

I would sit there, trying to suppress a grin, loving every minute of it.

Am I any of these things? Yes and no. I'm very far from being a psychopath - I love, care and have sympathy for way too many people to be even remotely close to psychopathy.

I may be a mild sociopath, but I'm usually far less sociopathic than many of the people who have accused me of being a sociopath! And considering some of the defining moments in my young life it would be surprising it I were not mildly sociopathic.

I have been sick with debilitating mental illnesses, but I'm not a schizophrenic. I simply enjoy a different, often inverted view of consensual reality, but it's still consensual.

And am I an asshole? Well, sometimes, but my problem is mostly that I'm too nice to people, even to those who aren't deserving of my kindness. Maybe I'm more of a doormat!

Basically I am like Jim Morrison: a sensitive, intelligent individual, but with the soul of a clown. I'm the nicest guy in the world - nothing but a big marshmallow!

My "character" is just a better, bolder, braver version of myself.

And who doesn't sympathize with the Columbine shooters every now and again?