I do not know if I am schizotypal or mildly autistic. I tend to be very lock-step and to have fixed routines in my eating, sleeping, shopping and grooming habits. I've been slowly breaking the hold of various neuroses on my life, but it is sometimes difficult to change when one way is all one has known for an entire lifetime.

I shop at the supermarket several times a day because I have trouble planning the practical too far into the future. Wegmans in Ocean Township is one of my haunts. I go there at least once a day to buy necessities.

However, I do not use a discount card because it is not "noble" to use a discount card. An extremely juvenile part of myself believes that it is "cheating", "unfair", maybe even close to outright theft. As a spiritual aristocrat, I am above dabbling in such base actions!

I also want both fame and anonymity. I want the world to know and appreciate my brilliance, but I also do not want strangers to acknowledge my various eccentricities.

This was ruined for me by an ambitious negress at Wegman's. She was fact. Probably conservative, reactionary and easily shocked. Very outgoing with normal people.

She had the shortest line so I went to her. After she checked me out she said: "You should get a discount card. You're in here all the time."

GODAMMIT! So they NOTICE that I am always in there. They probably talk about what a weirdo I am. I just want to blend in enough to do my damn shopping!

I always wanted to be a celebrity. I never thought I would find fame as the village weirdo. Don't you think if I wanted a discount card I would have gotten one by now.

But in addition to being too noble for a discounty card, I am also too SHY to ask for a discount card. I mean, actually going up to the counter and filling out a piece of paper is terrifying to me.

So, now Wegman's is ruined for me. Thanks, bitch.