Last night I watched "Terminator 2" on VHS for the first time in a long time. Before the film they showed a Subway sandwich ad. Wow. No web address at the bottom of the screen.
Watching "Terminator 2" I am reminded of who I am and who I once was. It feels like I was a different person in a different lifetime.
While watching Eddie Furlong run from the T-1000 it struck me that I was not depressed. And it was only 3 in the morning! The night was still young! I usually go to bed at 5. How was I able to actually handle two hours of not being depressed? It was frightening, overwhelming - and better than anything I have ever hoped for - to actually feel again, to feel emotions, to feel like a human being. To feel like the old me.
I used to watch movies like that and get excited for whatever girl I was crushing on at the time. Maybe I was like John Connor, destined to be the leader of the human resistance and this one special girl was to be by my side.
This was way before I was a cynical romantic and jaded idealist.
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